I learned unworthiness young, was taught that God was hard to please, and the only way to receive love was to outperform everyone else.
Thank heavens the story doesn’t end there.
I’ve been an ordained minister since 1986. The ministerial training I’ve received and pastoral care I’ve shared with thousands, combined with a decade plus of experience running the operations, sales and consulting branches of a large region for Ameriprise Financial Advisors® gave me the foundation I needed to begin my coaching business.
In late 2009 I decided I didn’t want to work in the corporate world anymore.
So I quit.
No plan. No backup. No safety net.
And then . . .
I picked up and moved myself to…
This is me at the Oprah Winfrey Studios in Chicago before I went on air for the Live Finale After Party Show.
Since we’re getting all close and stuff, I might as well also tell you that my favorite color is purple. I love chocolate chip cookies. My favorite musical artists are Prince, Mark Wilkinson, Harry Connick, Jr., and Michael Bublé. I don’t have any tattoos, but I’ve always wanted one. I like to hug trees. My favorite flowers are tulips. I sometimes get migraines. When I was little, my Aunt Linda used to call me Sparky Dinkledorf. (<– don’t get any ideas. ha ha)
Sometimes, I like to do art on my iPad. Here are a few things I’ve done. Clearly, I don’t have a “style” yet… but I do enjoy creating!
Put simply, I coach because I believe in the hearts of people and what we’re capable of contributing to the world.
In my work with thousands of humans and many thousands of hours of actual one-to-one coaching, I’ve found that what people need and want more than anything is access to skillful guidance that is profoundly compassionate and supports the heart while also offering actionable next steps towards positive change.
For me, there is nothing more powerful than witnessing a client in their experience, without the need to “fix” or change them. To accompany them – shoulder to shoulder – on their journey, in a way that assures them that they are not alone, helps them tap securely into their own innate wisdom, and celebrates their many wins along the way – that, to me, is what I live for.
From the decades I’ve worked in a wide variety of business, I’ve found that business is not all that complicated. Most of what you can learn about business is already out there – all the education you need is available, for free. The complications, challenges and rough spots that we all encounter stem from our humanity. Our “stuff” is what gets in our way. What’s complicated is us… not business.
The most effective support will help you navigate the landscape of your heart, including your neurodivergence, trauma, and sensitivity, all the while providing practical guidance for business and life.
That’s what I do. Nothing lights me up more.
(after one full year completed)
Numbers updated as of: 4.26.23
I have :
Some of the roles I’ve had which expand the depth of my experience:
And, of course, above everything else…
I had a pretty good life growing up. At least it looked that way from the outside. My birth father and mother provided well financially, and I didn’t want for much. I grew up privileged from many perspectives. What no one else knew (until much later in life) is that, as I grew up, I endured a lot of abuse of various kinds – from family and others – until I was in my late teens.
I was raised as one of Jehovah’s Witnesses and lived that way till I was 35 years old. I was a full-time minister, served at the World Headquarters for the JW Organization, was an “elder” in several congregations for over ten years. At 35, I came out as a gay man and my fellow “elders” said, “We believe you are a wicked man,” and they kicked me out (it’s called “disfellowshipping”).
The moment I got kicked out (February 1, 2007), I lost hundreds of my closest friends, my parents and two siblings and grandmother. The spiritual abuse and trauma from that (and the years of indoctrination) was violent and anything but loving. This caused profound spiritual trauma. I’m grateful to extended family – especially my Aunt Linda – for remaining a close and dear part of my blood-family.
Also, my ex-wife, who is pictured in one of the photographs above, was surprisingly supportive. We had been married for 13 years. She was devastated when I left, but was so kind to me. She has one of the most pure, tender and caring hearts I have ever encountered. I still love her with all my heart.
Since all of that trauma, I’ve re-built my family – I use the word “framily” (friends + family). I have friends all over the world that I love and care for, and who feel the same about me. I’ve also re-built my connection and relationship to the Divine.
In 2019, after six years devoting my life to another spiritual (and business) community, I had to let it all go because my integrity wouldn’t allow me to support the horrific misalignment and dysfunction I witnessed behind the scenes, and more importantly the unethical business practices. As I left, I was shunned, shamed, and banned from yet another community of people I considered family. My contributions over that time were erased and in its place, libel and slander was spread about me.
This caused even more spiritual trauma, which I have worked hard to heal from.
Living in Chicago, I enjoy walking the city, exploring new areas, trying out new restaurants. I live about 350 steps from an amazing beach right on Lake Michigan, which is my happy place.
Much of my non-work time is spent reading non-fiction books, doing artwork, photo/video editing, and spiritual practice. I also enjoy doing lots of introspection and exploring philosophy.
I’m an INFJ on the Myers-Briggs and a 2 on the Enneagram, and as I mentioned earlier, have ADD, complex-PTSD, am neurodivergent, a Highly Sensitive Person, on the autistic spectrum, and emotionally sensitive and intense.
As introverted as I am, one of the things I hold most precious is deep, intimately connected conversations with others – not surface talk (that’s exhausting to me) – but real, sincere, penetrative dialogue from the depth of our souls. Ahhhhhh.
And lastly, but not least, I want to introduce you to the new love of my life: Connick Alexander Spoon. He came into my life on November 27, 2015 and he’s 11 years old. He was a rescue originally, and I adopted him from someone in Denver, Colorado. He is a demure, quiet, playful and sweet little Italian Greyhound. I couldn’t love him any more than I do.
If you would like to say hello, please do. If I can be of service in some way, and what I’ve shared here helps you feel like we could have a connection, please reach out and share a bit about you.
Above all… please take good care of yourself and keep your heart nourished. The world needs more kind-hearted people and business owners in the world.
Wishing you peace, justice, mercy, love, and freedom,